Once there were a group of birds, who were neither Kitties nor Hawks, that realized they could charge all the other animals for the privilege of riding on their backs. "Hey," said the other animals, "That's a great idea!" Soon, all the animals who were hep began riding on the backs of the birds across the ocean and over the mountains and to Asia and everywhere else, getting there in a fraction of the time and now being able to commit various frauds, thefts, and aberration's of nature 24 hours a day in several time zones. The birds began to pass out little travel bags and offer movies while flying and serve drinks and force their various employees to wear little short skirts and silly pillbox hats.
But, as time went by, the birds were apparently stupid, and they began to lose massive amounts of money, despite the fact that they basically set prices between themselves, busted unions at will, and were used by every other animal in the universe when they needed to get to a fable quickly and conveniently.
"How can you lose massive amounts of money when everyone uses your service and you basically operate as a price-fixing monopoly?' asked all the animals of the animal kingdom.
"We're sorry, but you are going to have to pay for your headphones, and there will be no more dinner service on our flights," said the birds, as they raised ticket prices.
"How can you lose massive amounts of money," asked the other animals, "when you provide a useful service that is in demand by all consumers? Isn't that a violation of all known economic principles?"
"We're sorry," answered the birds, raising ticket prices again. "But you are now going to have to pay to bring items with you, pay for pillows and blankets, pay for paper tickets, pay for being too fat, and submit yourself to all kinds of humiliating and personally violating acts just to use our service. And, should you decide to cancel or change any part of your flight, May God Have Mercy On Your Soul. And we need a taxpayer bailout."
"How can you continue to raise prices while reducing services and still be used by a record number of people yet not make money?" asked the incredulous animals as they waited in line barefoot to be invasively cavity-searched by a minimum wage worker. "Isn't there, at some point, a time when you are going to make money? Is your entire organization run by incompetents who have never touched a dollar bill before? Seriously, we are not being mean, but we have no clue how you can operate as you do."
"Oooooh," answer the birds, "We're sorry. Volcano. We'll talk later."
Moral: You can't get there from here. At least not easily.
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